trust

God would never give you more than you can handle. My typical responce... I just wish he didnt trust me so much. I am not a spiritual person by far, and I can probably name everytime that I looked at the sky saying "really!" I dont look to "the big man upstairs" for any advice or guiding signs but I have to say I do admire his trust in me. He trusts me more than I trust myself usually and as much I want to march my ass up there wring his neck and say cut the shit, I know at the end of the day Ill be right here, accepting every challenge with this quirky smirk on my face. I just wish we could trust people as much as the world trusts us. With everything each and everyone of us is dealt, every card, every bad hand, up and down, high and low, with everything going on we are a lot stronger then any of us know, we just need to have faith and trust. Trust in ourselves, trust in our families, and most importantly trust in our friends. It is our friends that are the glue that holds everything together even when we feel like everything is falling apart, they are there. Trust in them. Go to them. Love them. Be honest with them, and you will see its as easy as being honest with yourself.

Shot Seventeen: trust is trust

tails...

Well tails won. Im walking away. Im not just walking away from KC, Im walking away from everything. Im walking away from finding someone, investing in someone, opening my heart to someone just to learn that its all games and I will never be good enough.


Right now I wish I was invisible. Im blasting my music so I dont have to hear myself think so I dont have to doubt myself but no matter how loud it is I cant stop thinking. Just when i thought things were good and going to be okay and I was okay, this seems to be that this is the last straw, the last blow to the wall i have rebuilt for myself, like going back to the I'd rather feel nothing attitude is the only option. And at this moment, I'd rather feel nothing.